Doubts (BR)

Lore section: doubts betterruins:doubts · from betterruins

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Doubts 1 / Commoner
Why now?

Do not misunderstand me, I am grateful we can at least have this.
But why now? For many years I have dreamt of cooperation at this scale.

Why did it take the Rot to unite us?
Is it only because we now stand together against a common foe?
If hatred for an Other is the only thing that will let us overcome hatred for another, then…
I pray that, if the Grand Machine works, we do not return to our old ways.
And that if it fails, we stay united until the bitter end.

Doubts 2 / Blackguard
I stood at the gates for years leaning on my trusty poleax. A bardiche, a terrific weapon. She’d be certain to strike fear into the hearts of those taking shelter, at least those who retain their sight still. I miss her weight in my hands. How I wish I’d had room to swing her down here!

In truth, more than anything I miss the distance she put between me and those ne’er-do-wells. I used to envy the bowmen. They never had to see the fruits of their labour up close. Now that I’m stuck in these tight tunnels with nothing but a shortsword, though, I understand how good I had it with my polearm.

Doubts 3 / Malefactor
Is it wrong of me to wish suffering upon others?
These… malefactors, we call them. People who have lied and stolen and murdered.
I understand why they wear the masks now.
Had I recognized him, I would have sent him to God, myself.
Instead, I am left hoping that they all meet their end on the surface, him among them.

Doubts 4 / Hunter
I think I shot a person today.

It was hard to tell due to the Rot. I was seeking quarry at the perimeter of the encroaching disease, trying to bring in what meat I could before it was lost.

Most quarry runs toward you, away from the plagued lands, choosing a swift death over slow decay. It’s risky but you can’t argue with the results. I don’t think I’ve ever heard one ask me to put it out of its misery before, though.

Doubts 5 / Clockmaker
The Prima Materia is beyond even my understanding.
And I would consider myself quite learned.
I wish I could be happier for it. I always enjoyed learning new things.

Instead I have never felt more like a bumbling fool. Like I did when I first set foot in the University. The world seemed so small then, in retrospect. Now the sheer amount of possibilities overwhelms me, and I would not know where to begin.

I will leave it to Jonas Falx to figure out the particulars, as most of my peers have, and work diligently to provide the parts he requests.

Doubts 6 / Tailor
Over, under, draw it through…

I’ve seen a great many adopt mantras in these trying times. Me, I already have one. It has stayed with me through many years of weaving.

Over, under, draw it through…

I refuse to let my hands idle. There’s always someone in need of warmth, in both senses of the word. I am grateful I am able to provide it to them.

Over, under, draw it through…

And when this all blows over, I hope that when they remember this place, they think of the warm fabric upon their skin and not the cold stone beneath their feet.